tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-154598762024-03-07T10:17:15.725-08:00Stranger in this PlaceThe Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.comBlogger117125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-25428799333077821572009-04-01T20:34:00.000-07:002009-04-01T23:10:58.440-07:00After a long absenceI recently flew back east to lead a workshop on living the lifestyle of a missionary in the here and now, and spent a few days in Pittsburgh after the conference. I hung out with my friend Amanda after spending a leisurely morning at a hospitable community called Friendship House. It's located in a small neighborhood named Friendship near the edge of the modest city of Pittsburgh. Right outside of Friendship house, Friendship Ave stretches, connecting a line of houses in a community that has felt the pain of poverty and gentrification, but this beautiful community has been involved for at least a decade. Before spending time with Amanda, I helped serve in their after school program, shooting some hoops with some middle schoolers and listening to John Paul deliver a litergy to the kids in the midst of their raucous noise. After that time, I went with Amanda to a local coffee shop that unfortunately was closing down in a week due to lack of business. There were a number (about six or seven) neighborhood kids hanging out inside the shop, which gave it a homey feel, and they immediately gravitated to Amanda and me, so we started playing chess with them. The lady behind the counter offered them some hot chocolate in tiny little mugs, and it all contributed to a feeling that this little coffee shop felt like a bit of heaven on earth.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-61716793236845213382008-11-12T20:41:00.001-08:002008-11-12T21:00:53.237-08:00ChrisA couple days ago I was chilling outside of the local police department (just because I needed a place to sit while I waited for a friend) and a white guy walks out muttering under his breath (but loud enough for me to hear) "I just can't take it anymore, I can't stop, I can't take it anymore." I looked at him, and he looked at me, and I asked him what the problem was. "I can't stop." <br />"What can't you stop?"<br />"Heroin."<br />I talked with him for the next five minutes encouraging him to seek Christ and gave him my number. I also mentioned the church I've been going to, and he seemed really interested, because I told him that it's the kind of church that accepts people whoever they are--homeless, gay, yuppie, black, white, latino, whoever. I hope he calls me, and I'm praying that God will give him enough realization of his need that he will seek more help.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-90425394741438597172008-11-08T14:29:00.000-08:002008-11-08T15:50:33.839-08:00New paradigm on evangelismI was reading in Christianity Today from the July 08 edition, and read an article about a way of sharing Jesus with people called the "Big Story." The Four Spiritual Laws are replaced by four circles, with the following four captions. The first circle starts in the top left side of the page, the second one the top right side, etc.<br />Circle 1. Designed for Good<br />Circle 2. Damaged by evil<br />Circle 3. Restored for better<br />Circle 4. Sent together to heal<br /><br />I like the emphasis that James Choung puts on the kingdom of God in his presentation of the gospel in these four circles. It's not just about me and Jesus--it's about joining in the work of the kingdom! A point that James makes in the article is that in explaining the diagram to people, many try to jump from circle 2 to circle 4, but it is impossible without the intervention of Jesus through the cross in circle 3.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-26579256435580218192008-11-01T19:13:00.000-07:002008-11-01T19:23:49.132-07:00"The idolatry of money means that the moral worth of a person is judged in terms of the amount of money possessed or controlled. The acquisition and accumulation of money in itself is considered evidence of virtue. It does not so much matter how money is acquired--by work or invention, through inheritance or marriage, by luck or theft--the main thing is to get some. The corollary of this doctrine, of course, is that those without money are morally inferior--weak, or indolent, or otherwise less worthy as human beings. Where money is an idol, to be poor is a sin. <br />This is an obscene idea of justification, directly in contradiction with the Bible. In the gospel none are saved by any works of their own, least of all by the mere acquisition of money. In fact, the New Testament is redundant in citing the possession of riches as an impediment to salvation when money is regarded idolatrously. At the same time, the notion of justification by acquisition of money is empirically absurd, for it oversimplifies the relationship of the prosperous and the poor and overlooks the dependence of the rich upon the poor for their wealth. In this world human beings live at each other's expense, and the affluence of the few is proximately related to, and supported by, the poverty of the many. <br />This interdependence of rich and poor is something Americans are tempted to overlook, since so many Americans are in fact prosperous, but it is true today as it was in earlier times: the vast multitudes of people on the face of the earth are consigned to poverty for their whole lives, without any serious prospect whatever of changing their conditions. Their hardships in great measure make possible the comfort of those who are not poor; their poverty maintains the luxury of others; their deprivation purchases the abundance most Americans take for granted."<br />Pg. 245-246 "A Keeper of the Word," by KellermanThe Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-50101947798958801212008-11-01T18:57:00.000-07:002008-11-01T19:05:56.009-07:00Seminaries"The seminaries have generally been so covetous of academic recognition and so anxious for locus within the ethos and hierarchy of the university that they have not noticed how alien and hostile those premises are to the peculiar vocation of a seminary. thus the seminaries succumb to disseminating ideological renditions of the faith that demean the vitality of the biblical witness by engaging in endless classifications and comparisons of ideas. All this eschews commitment and precludes a confessional study of theology...the appropriate location of the seminary is within the church, the Body of Christ, and not within the university. The seminary's manner in the preparation and qualification of those to be ordained should exemplify the church rather than imitate the university...In short, the enthrallment of the seminary within the ideology of the university sponsors a professionalization of the ordained ministry that aborts the edification of the people of the church and that contradicts the servant character of the clergy's vocation."<br />pgs. 257-258, "A Keeper of the Word" by KellermanThe Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-3210350301044585552008-11-01T18:47:00.000-07:002008-11-01T18:54:01.074-07:00Are American churches viable political threats?"...The churches in America are more innocuous...there is an elaborate American comity by which political domination of the churches is sanctioned by the status of church property holdings. Thus, tax exemption for the churches inhibits a critical political witness by the churches. Thus, a presidential assurance of aid to church-related schools can in sure the silence of the ecclesiastical hierarchy on certain public issues. In short, the dependence of the American churches upon property renders the churches so utterly vulnerable to political manipulation as to obviate a more direct ecclesiastical interference."<br />pg. 271 "A Keeper of the Word" by KellermanThe Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-40723313256146536662008-10-23T13:47:00.000-07:002008-10-23T14:07:46.315-07:00Fear nothing"Remember, now, that the state has only one power it can use against human beings: death. The state can persecute you, prosecute you, imprison you, exile you, execute you. All of these mean the same thing. The state can consign you to death. The grace of Jesus Christ in this life is that death fails. There is nothing the state can do to you, or to me, which we need fear."<br />--William Stringfellow, from when he was asked to give a short word to a group of believers meeting together to support Daniel Berrigan and others from the "Catonsville Nine," who were on trial at the time. I've been reading from "A Keeper of the Word," an anthology of Stringfellow's writings by Bill Wylie-Kellerman. I highly recommend it.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-46588476508068328072008-10-23T13:32:00.000-07:002008-10-23T13:41:11.026-07:00Teddy BearAfter the after school program finished on Tuesday, I walked around downtown for a while, deep in thought, and I heard a voice from the side of the sidewalk ask me, "is that a guitar?" pointing to the little travelers guitar I had over my shoulder. I turned, smiled and began a conversation with this elderly black man who had three or four cigarette packs neatly displayed on a handkerchief in front of him. As we talked about four or five people interupted our conversation to ask him for something, and he would either sell them a cigarette for 25 cents or deny them their request. The street was kind of noisy, so I couldn't hear everything that was said, but I gathered that he also sold other drugs besides nicotine, but didn't want to sell them with me around. He soon introduced himself as "Teddy bear" and proceeded to lift up his shirt and reveal a bright blue teddy bear hiding in his pocket. When I offered to let him play my guitar, he was surprised and exceptionally grateful, saying something to the effect that this was the nicest thing someone had done for him in a while. He offered a seat next to him by laying out a folded up towel for me to sit on, and I sat next to him and chatted while he idly played some blues licks. He seemed to have a good amount of skill from accumulated years of experience, yet it also seemed as though it had been a while since he had a guitar in his hands. Although it was very hard for me to understand what he was saying, he seemed to be spiritually attentive, and was concerned for my safety on the streets. When I got a call from a friend I was planning on hanging out with, I bid him farewell, and we both promised that we'd see eachother again.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-86804761125730406222008-10-15T10:31:00.000-07:002008-10-23T13:46:23.806-07:00Farewells, Cookie, and Old MacdonaldI went to my normal hangout after a sad night at the youth program. One of our longest standing staff will be leaving in three weeks (she has been there for seven years), and one of the kids, Christopher, lost his best friend to a shot from a gang. I sat with him for a while, not saying much, just asking an occasional question, and letting him share. I listened to Lisa sharing her heart with the kids, a kind of matriarchal farewell blessing to them, encouraging them that she loved them all dearly and was simply seeking to follow God's will for her life. I left the room without saying goodbye to that many people and on the way to my spot outside of Pinkberry I noticed an older lady in front of me, wearing scraggly clothing and a blanket over her back which was slightly dragging, and I wondered if there was anything else she was dragging behind her in her life. I thought she was mumbling to herself, so I cautiously greeted her, only to be surprised at the lucidity of her response. She gave me a big smile and asked me if I had any cigarettes. My negative response didn't end our conversation, and I gratefully chatted with her about where I was from and where I lived as we walked over to Little Tokyo. As we passed by a bench outside of a frozen yogurt shop, she asked me to sit down and wait for her while she got a cigarette. She came back not only with a cigarette but with a little plastic tray full of slightly melted mochi, a delicious mixture of icecream balls wrapped in a yummy gummy bread. I ended eating four of the six because she had just had a big meal. Apparently, she was able to live completely off of unfinished meals of patrons of restaurants in the area. She was born in South Korea originally, and married a U.S. soldier. She told me the marriage didn't last for long--only a couple of years, leaving her out on the streets, unable to have much contact with her family in Korea. Although she misses them, she also mentioned to me that it is good for her to be here, where there is plenty of food to eat. I am in complete agreement. After she left with kind words, I went back to a bench to play my guitar for a while, and a man came up to me with a grin and an "Eyi eyi oh" in greeting, and proceeded to share a joke with me (I can't remember what it was, but it had a slightly off color ending). As we chatted a bit, he complemented me on my upbringing--I must have good parents (which I do). I offered him a couple bucks (he hadn't asked anything of me) and he shared another joke, interspersed with occasional Eyi eyi oh's, so I asked him if he was Old Macdonald, and yes apparently that is what some people call him.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-51710065264617503342008-10-05T18:32:00.000-07:002008-10-05T18:38:23.293-07:00Interview in Portland, revisitedWell, I earlier posted a link to an interview a journalist had with me when I was sleeping on the streets of Portland. The link didn't work for a while, but then resurfaced so now I'm going to post the whole article so as not to lose it again. I pretty much agree with what I said back then, except for my comments about marriage--back then, I make it sound as if I'm only interested in dating or marriage with someone who wants or is open to living the homeless lifestyle. That's no longer true. <br /><br /> The following is a section of an online book called Youth Stories by Eric Marley. <br /><br />Chapter 3 Nathan<br /><br /> <br /><br />Sometimes I am frustrated by my inability to go back and ask follow-up questions. Nathan is one of the best examples I can site of this inadequacy, including what are probably poor technical interviewing techniques as well. However, he is a good example of the educated homeless; those whose stated reason to be on the street are different than the standard ones. My frustration with this interview is my inability to get to the bottom of the real reason for his homelessness. I think it has more to do with his "weakness" than he is admitting. That notwithstanding, he was an interesting young man and a breath of fresh air – a nice change from some of the more heart-wrenching stories I'd heard that day.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Nathan was laying in a doorway at about 8 am on March 10, 2007 when we first passed him. After another interview we passed by him again and he was rolling his sleeping bag. I noticed his bright eyes, cheerful countenance and North Face sleeping bag – none of these being standard equipment for homeless people. I was overcome with curiosity. This interview is the result of that. Nathan seemed to be an example of one of the good but confused people on the road. He's not addicted to drugs, there was no alcohol on his breath and he certainly doesn't seem to be a violent person. But there were in congruencies, holes in his story. There were also references to some undisclosed weakness that he was battling. This notwithstanding, whether he is being completely honest with himself or not he is almost certainly doing others some good with his ready smile and sense of humor. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Interview: March 10, 2007<br /><br />Place: Portland, Oregon in a doorway on 9th street near Burnside, about 10:45 am<br /><br />Weather: Overcast<br /><br />Subject: Nathan, 23 years old.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Your name?<br /><br />Nathan.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Where is your hometown?<br /><br />Well, I grew up overseas in different places. I guess the closest thing is Quakertown, Pennsylvania.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Did you live there long?<br /><br />Maybe about 3 years total. Not too long.<br /><br /> <br /><br />What's your education level, Nathan?<br /><br />College graduate.<br /><br /> <br /><br />I knew it!<br /><br />(We both laugh uproariously)<br /><br /> <br /><br />Where did you graduate from and what was your major?<br /><br />Grover City College in Pennsylvania. My major was Christian Thought.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Interesting. So why are you out of doors?<br /><br />I'm traveling. I've been hitchhiking. I want to visit some different Christian communities throughout the US. I also want to learn what it's like to be out in the streets, learn from the people. Just be with them.<br /><br /> <br /><br />What are you learning?<br /><br />Um, I think I'm learning that it's easy to judge but it's hard to love.<br /><br /> <br /><br />What are you going to do with this information?<br /><br />I'm trying to explain…it's much easier to learn experientially. But I'm trying to explain through my blog and through emails and stuff to my friends and family just what the lifestyle's like so they can come to a better understanding about how they can relate to the homeless. So I hope to basically tell other people from the middle class so they would come to a better understanding and have more compassion and more wisdom I guess, relating to the homeless.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Why is that important to you? You're a college graduate – you could have a more comfortable life I would imagine.<br /><br />I worked two years with AmeriCorps. The second year I worked with homeless families. Basically calling up shelters and helping them get into shelters. And I realized that there's a lot of help out there for the homeless, but there is not a lot of compassion. So…I think primarily what we need as a middle class, the people that have their stuff together, to learn how to humble themselves and to help other people out, and not be so concerned about their own needs as the needs of others. And what people out in the streets need is not so much a judgmental attitude, "you need to stop drinking" or "you need to stop drugs", but more of a compassionate, "hey, do you want to sit here and chat?" Not necessarily offering anything, but just becoming friends, and creating that dialogue. I think that for too long we've been separating ourselves – the middle class has been moving out into the suburbs, and leaving the city. Now the rich are moving back into the city and kicking the poor out to who-knows-where – somewhere else.<br /><br /> <br /><br />How is this tied to your spirituality? You obviously consider yourself a spiritual person.<br /><br />Yes. I've been learning a lot about faith and about life through the eyes of the homeless. I went on this trip because of my faith in Christ. I'd say it's taught me that my weaknesses are still the same when I'm on the streets as they were beforehand. I had this idealistic thing, "well, maybe I won't struggle as much with my pet sins because I'll have to be constantly relying on God to help me through this. Boy, that was a big mistake.<br /><br /> <br /><br />So they're still there.<br /><br />Oh yeah. So, I'm going back to LA because…I guess that's my new hometown since I stayed there two years recently.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Was that also with AmeriCorps?<br />Yes, but I was also doing an internship with a missionary group called "Servants To Partners." They sent teams overseas to the slums, so, I'm going to go back there and kind of reconnect with some friends and develop more of accountability, a stronger accountability.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Tell me about your family. How do they feel about you being out here – are they worried?<br /><br />Um, I think my parents are okay with me being out here. They were Christian missionaries.<br /><br /> <br /><br />They were? So they probably had similar experiences?<br /><br />I would say my lifestyle growing up in Korea and South Africa was maybe slightly lower middle class lifestyle of an American so I was pretty comfortable growing up. Since then I've come to a deeper conviction of the reality of suffering in the world and the need to take on some of that suffering in order to be a real person. To be involved in helping other people and being "Jesus" to them.<br /><br /> <br /><br />I think the Christian doctrine is that Jesus "descended below all things", so you are really trying to emulate his path, is that correct?<br /><br />Yes, I think that in following Jesus – which is essentially what being a Christian is – it's not all the other things that people add on. I don't even label myself a Christian because people misunderstand what it means. Yeah, so, following Jesus means taking up your cross, which means suffering. He said if anyone would come after me he must deny himself, take up his cross daily and follow me. So I don't claim to be doing that right now. One of my favorite philosophers, Soren Kierkegaard, said he didn't claim to be a Christian because he didn't think he was actually following the level that Jesus called his followers to follow. But…I'm trying to anyways.<br /><br /> <br /><br />You're making an effort.<br /><br />Yes, I'm making an effort.<br /><br /> <br /><br />And yet, as an outsider, I'd say you're going through tremendous lengths to try to follow Jesus in your understanding of people that are less advantaged than you.<br /><br />Yes.<br /><br /> <br /><br />So is it your weaknesses, or things you want to overcome, is that part of it, too?<br /><br />Yes, I'd say it is. Some people distinguish between their 'social gospel' and there's this whole camp of people like that and then there's this other camp of people that are all about holiness. "Oh I have to not do certain things, or be a certain person." Well, I think Jesus encapsulates both of those together. He was a very holy person – and to distinguish holiness again from what some people think Christians view to be, such as not smoking and drinking and all that stuff. I'm talking about holiness as being set apart for God's work. God is holy and that means he is set apart. So that means…it's very complicated since he's also with us. So…um, I think that the important thing is for personal holiness, values, to also be motivated by love, which means action. Right now I'm struggling with personal holiness values. So I need to kind of reconnect with God on a personal level to deal with some of those issues. So and then I'll better be able to help others out. You can't help others if you're not working and trying to help yourself.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Where do you want to be in 5 years?<br /><br />I'd like to be two places in five years. Either overseas with a team such as Servants To Partners helping to see Gods kingdom come into a third world slum or somewhere here in the US hitchhiking traveling around on foot, but by that time with an established community that I can always come back to. Um, so there's a community called "Simple Way" in Philadelphia. It's a group of believers that have come together and they are living in a run down area. They live together, pool their resources. So it's not just a community in the sense that they meet together, they also live together.<br /><br /> <br /><br />So it's like a commune?<br /><br />Yes, exactly. So at that point I'd either like to be overseas or here in the US with a community that I can come back to.<br /><br /> <br /><br />Do you want to have a family of your own someday?<br /><br />It's kind of up in the air. That's a good question. I do think that my family in a lot of ways is the people I'm with wherever I am. That's one of the things I love about traveling. It's meeting completely new people and establishing this connection – you know you feel like you've been brothers or sisters for a long time. I'm open to eventually getting married. I wouldn't say I'm going to pursue it right now, but I'm hoping to. There aren't too many women out there who want to travel around hitchhiking, sleeping in doorways. (Laughs). But there's a few I think. Actually one of the things that got me interested in this was an article in Prism magazine (an evangelical magazine that talks about issues related to social justice) about this homeless couple in France. One was a former Franciscan priest that started going out on visits with a Franciscan brother, living in shelters and sleeping outside with the homeless – he felt that God was calling him to do this. And actually he met a lady that was serving at a shelter and she wanted to go out with them so the three of them went around for a while. Eventually he got married to her, so he renounced his celibacy vows and they went around as a couple. About three quarters of the year they would be out on the streets.<br /><br /> <br /><br />So is the path you're on now going to help you be where you want to be in 5 years?<br /><br />Yeah, I've been visiting different communities in the US. I spent a week in a monastery – that was interesting. I also spent a week in a 500 person Christian commune in Chicago. Just north of Chicago they had another one where they had different houses where they would live together. But the one 500 person one in Chicago they all lived in an old hotel, right in uptown Chicago. Jesus People USA. They run a shelter there and it's pretty cool.<br /><br /> <br /><br />What's the name of your blog?<br /><br />Wannabemendicant.blogspot.com<br /><br /> <br /><br />What is a mendicant?<br /><br />That's a beggar. The mendicants were, in the earlier church, back in the middle Ages, the mendicant orders were groups of people like Saint Francis and his followers. But I've only panhandled a couple of times. I kind of see it in a spiritual sense – a beggar for God. <br /><br /> <br /><br />Thanks, Nathan.<br /><br />You're welcome. <br /><br /><br />http://bookbanshee.securespsite.com/Sociology/Youth%20Stories%20-%20Book%20In%20Progress.docThe Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-30463975003108479112008-09-15T14:04:00.000-07:002008-10-05T18:42:30.072-07:00The robed strangerFor the past month, I've noticed a tall white man with a long brown beard (Gandalf style) wearing a blue robe walking around inside the library and nearby it. I had seen him at least 6 times, at various places, and always wanted to approach him, because I suspected he was a Christian, and also homeless, and had seen him with a little travelers Bible. Finally, after getting some grub inside Fatima, I noticed him sitting in the seating outside the doors and determined to introduce myself. He smiled warmly and offered me a seat as we talked about our lives. He was older than I suspected--about 35 (when I thought he was in his late 20's.) He had previously been a truck driver, back east, but felt God was calling him to walk prophetically as a homeless evangelist. He has spent time street preaching, and even challenging authorities with the word of God, i.e. he once went to WB and told the security guard that he'd like to speak to the manager, and when someone came out, he calmly told him that WB needed to repent of making shows that were displeasing to God, and had a gracious conversation about it for a couple minutes. The impression I got of his preaching is that it is usually one on one, and is very gracious--he'll calmly ask people to repent and talk about Jesus with them. This is the style of street confrontation that I would feel most comfortable with doing myself. Stephen (perhaps he was named after the first martyr--indeed he has a desire to be martyred for his faith) spends most of his time during the day praying and reading and talking with people. As we were chatting together in the early evening, several people walked by and greeted him by name. One of them, named Jerry, sat down and talked with us for a while, and Stephen noticed that he had a black bag with pornographic magazines in it. Stephen calmly mentioned to him that it was not pleasing to God for him to view women in that way, and he immediately got very defensive, explaining how he believed that it was ok to masturbate and use pornography, and how he used to be involved in the normal entertainment industry, but couldn't cut it, so now he was trying to get into the porn industry. We calmly shared with him that he couldn't continue in this and still have a viable relationship with Jesus, and I shared from personal experience how sexual sin has cut me off from God. Sadly, he didn't accept our concerns in the moment, but I hope that the Holy Spirit will convict him from the conversation. I was really encouraged to be with Stephen--I felt like we had very similar values in sharing Christ with others. For example, Stephen mentioned after our conversation with Jerry how much he appreciated that I wasn't offended by Jerry's "colorful" language.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-52129297903229540902008-09-14T16:20:00.000-07:002008-09-14T16:25:25.371-07:00The Invitation"Come here to <em></em>me<em></em>." Amazing! Yes, human compasion does indeed do something for those who labor and are burdened. We feed the hungry, clothe the naked, give charity, build charitable organizations, and if the compassion is really heartfelt, we also visit those who are downtrodden. But to invite them to come to one, that is something that is not so easily done. It would mean that your household and way of life would be completely changed. To invite them in this way would mean to live together in entirely the same manner. You would have to become poor, sharing completely the same conditions as those who are distressed and burdened. <br />This invitation can only be made by changing your own conditions, so they are in keeping with theirs, provided that your life is not already like theirs, as was the case with him who says, "Come here to me, all you who labor and are burdened."<br />From Provocations, a collection of the spiritual writings of Soren KierkegaardThe Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-20391052254022948302008-09-11T10:52:00.001-07:002008-09-11T10:55:34.105-07:00Earth has no SorrowRecently I've been listening to a song by the Vigilantes of Love that I can't get enough of. I love songs that convey struggle--a deep, earnest struggle between sorrow and joy, life and death, peace and war. Here are the lyrics:<br /><br />it's time to get the lash it's time to get the rope<br />sharpen the razor grab the microscope<br />it won't be pretty when they cut the tether<br />sometimes you lose your address to find your shelter<br /><br />why is joy something i must steal<br />starving skeletons looking for a meal<br />out in the graveyard the church bells peal<br />earth has no sorrow heaven can't heal<br /><br />i bought a crap detector it emptied all my savings<br />it's got a hair trigger feel for the slightest provocation<br />not there to spill blood or judge out of line<br />it's just a modern convenience to save you some time<br /><br />johnny says to sarah as he takes her by the hand<br />"i hear angels 'cross that river in beulahland"<br />the waters are cold and they're deep my friend<br />i'm going down down down and coming up again<br />i'm checking my closets since i don't know when<br />surely life is more than learning how to live with your skeletons<br />wind swing low whisper in my ears<br />wind swing low dry these tearsThe Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-69340235578343626272008-09-10T11:52:00.000-07:002008-09-10T11:56:48.617-07:00From Paul the WalkerThis a quote from Paul's blog (a guy I met at a community out near Chicago called Reba Place--he had spent many years traveling around the US by faith, trusting God and His people to provide for him along the road), in which he describes his opiniont of Jesus' method of transforming the world grassroots:<br /><br /><br />“Instead of taking the position of "good overlord," he went directly to the bottom, to the people who were oppressed, and showed them how to be free. Not by changing the world around them, but by helping them to change themselves. By showing them the power of faith. So the poor and weak could face their oppressors without fear and refuse to beg from them or be controlled by their threats, obeying only God, their loving Father."<br /><br />http://cimarronline.blogspot.comThe Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-90649171430028471292008-09-09T12:10:00.000-07:002008-09-09T13:19:22.841-07:00Night CatsHe was walking a couple feet in front of me, shaggy hair down to his shoulders, looked like he was mixed, and he stomped his feet in front of a young cat, causing it to run under a nearby metallic black fence. "You don't like cats?" I queried, about two meters behind him. <br />"I love cats--I just wanted him to be safe--it's not safe on these streets," he responded, with a warm, somewhat deeper voice that immediately conveyed to me his goodwill for the cat, and for his neighbor. We chatted for a bit about cats, and he mentioned to me that there was a whole family of cats who lived in the park a block away, so we casually strolled over there, sharing bits and pieces of our separate lives. I was overjoyed to see a cat hanging out by the fence of the park (it's locked at night) and we continued our conversation, which now moved onto more spiritual matters. He has been a follower of Jesus for several years, after traveling to Europe, and living homelessly there and in the US, where he met Jesus through some loving people at the Los Angeles Mission. He plans to leave in a couple of days in order to do a sixth month stint at a program outside the city (he confessed he has been taking consolation in drinking, more recently. After a little while, an older lady came next to the park, pushing her large grocery cart brimming with her stuff, and dropped a large pile of cat food past the wrought iron gate for the cats to feed on--and they came--probably five or six of them at various sizes. Ben called her "mama" and introduced me to her. She was hunched over and when I talked with her after Ben left, she seemed to be somewhat senile. The parts of what she said that I could make out broke my heart--how she had been "sodomized" when she was homeless, but now stayed inside. I bade my farewell, after she said she had to leave because she had a busy night, and might not get much sleep (I have no idea what she was going to be doing). I hope to see the cats, and Ben, and Mama, again.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-73181170959494354472008-09-02T20:27:00.000-07:002008-09-02T20:35:59.830-07:00Moving from Azusa streetThree nights ago, I was woken up by one of the quasi cops (the city hires people who wear purple shirts to go around downtown to help out the cops) who told me that I wouldn't be allowed to sleep there anymore due to an increased number of break-ins in the area (because I wasn't technically sleeping in the appropriate sleeping zone for the homeless in downtown). I'm bummed, because I really enjoyed sleeping on Azusa street--it was a little secluded, it was easy to attach my bag to a nearby pole, and it has sentimental value to me now (partially due to the fact that the Pentecostal revival happened on that street back in the day). I'm not sure where I'm gonna sleep tonight, but I'll find somewhere different--I've got a lot of options!The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-40791117993095513742008-09-01T17:26:00.000-07:002008-10-05T18:52:41.328-07:00Money, Sacrifice, and InstitutionalismLast night I had a great night playing Settlers of Catan with my old roommates Jeremy and Charlton at Charlton's place he shares with his wife Theresa in Pasadena. After playing a rousing game (it was anyone's game at the end, which made it more exciting) we got into an interesting discussion concerning our discipleship among the poor. I had mentioned briefly a conversation I had had with two other friends about how we should interpret and live out Jesus' imperative to "give to everyone who begs of you," in Luke, and different ways that may look like. I shared some stories about my experience with the homeless of LA, and how, though most of the people who asked me for money were drug addicts, there were still some who I helped financially who were legitimately in need for food or other necessities. Just yesterday, as I was just about ready to hop on the elevator to the gold line train station, I was stopped by a young black man about my age who asked for help--a buck or two to help him out. I pulled out my earphones, and looked him directly in the face, seeking to engage him on a deeper level, and I found out that he had recently come to LA, and was dealing with the criminal justice system--in and out of jail, and was currently homeless. After a couple minutes I decided to give him five dollars from my pocket, and he was extremely grateful, gushing about how difficult it was for him here in LA and how he would sleep on the trains and avoid the skid row area because it was unsafe. We ended up talking for almost thirty minutes after I gave him the money and some granola bars, and I believe that the act of trusting him with money, not just with food, helped him to open up more with me and we actually had a relatively deep connection. Hopefully he calls me back later (I gave him my phone and email address). Although in the past, I've been burned by people who have fed me stories just to get me to give them some cash for drugs, who ran off as soon as the money was in their hands, I have come to believe that even if the majority of people who ask for help may be struggling with substance abuse doesn't mean that we should never give financial help to those who ask for it. <br />Anyhew, the discussion led us to discuss the merits and defects of giving to Christian nonprofits as opposed to directly giving to people in need. My friend, Charlton, expressed to us some of his frustrations in working at one of the Christian homeless rescue missions downtown. He is one of the IT staff there, and is often asked to produce reports and to crunch numbers for the other staff. He mentioned how much money he sees going into the basic upkeep of the shelter, rather than into the programs they are seeking to help the homeless with. It seems this is the basic problem with institutions in general--what was started as something good and helpful to people sometimes becomes a monster that requires the sacrifice of time, money, and energy in work that has little of anything to do with simple acts of service to the poor. My other friend shared about how he has learned from his ministry in a young church plant in the neighborhood of Lincoln Heights, a low income neighborhood of LA that has it's share of gangs. He mentioned how difficult it is to be wise with giving in their context as well. The family that they have given the most financial help to has ended up being the family who is least interested in following Jesus, but still wants to stay in contact with the church because of their financial help. My friend mentioned that he believed that they were being faithful to God's call in giving the money away, and had spent much time in prayer, seeking God's direction. It was simply a reminder that a simple giving of money away to the poor is not as easy as it sounds. I also shared a story of Jackie Pullinger, who is a missionary to the slums of Hong Kong. An aquaintance of hers, a prostitute came to her in desperation because she was being sold into sex slavery due to her large debt she owed, and needed a large sum of money to pay off her debt. Jackie prayed about it, and believed God was asking her to give up her most prized possession, her violin (or clarinet, I can't remember what instrument) that she used to play in the Hong Kong symphony. Although it was a very difficult sacrifice for her (she had long lived by faith, trusting God for her daily needs, and the instrument was the only thing of value left that she owned), she was obedient to God's leading in her life, and sold the instrument to buy back the girl from her "owner." The gang boss told her that it was a futile thing for her to do, because the girl would eventually go back to her old ways sometime down the road. Although Jackie knew this could happen, she also knew that just like Jesus died for the world, knowing not all would accept His sacrifice for them, so also would she sacrifice her prized possession for the girl without knowing whether the girl would truly change or not. Similarly, I have come to the belief that giving and love should not be based on our limited knowledge of the worthiness or unworthiness of the person recieving or love or gift. We all are so much in need of grace. I close with a quote from Kahlil Gibran from his poem The Prophet in a section called "Giving."<br />You often say, "I would give, but only to the deserving."<br /><br />"The trees in your orchard say not so, nor the flocks in your pasture.<br /><br />They give that they may live, for to withhold is to perish.<br /><br />Surely he who is worthy to receive his days and his nights is worthy of all else from you.<br /><br />And he who has deserved to drink from the ocean of life deserves to fill his cup from your little stream."The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-14712427288422148112008-08-31T13:23:00.000-07:002008-09-02T20:45:32.936-07:00Randy (Lurch)Last Thursday, I was hanging out in Pasadena after being dropped off at Trader Joes so I could buy some cereal (thankfully, I'm gonna be able to store cereal and milk at the after school program I volunteer at so that I don't have to spend as much money on food), and I decided to see whether a certain 3$ theatre trully existed. I got off of the gold line train at the Lake station, had dinner at a teryaki place, and waltzed down Lake, until I hit Colorado. I knew it was somewhere along Colorado, and found it a while later. I was shocked how cheap it was, but also how old the movies were--about 2 months old or so most of them, but it was still a great deal--only two dollars for matinee, and three for evening tickets. I was waiting for the showing of Iron Man, (though I had seen it before, I was quite bored) and a guy walked up to me and sat down on the bench next to me. I asked him how he was doing, as he looked a little dirty, and tired. He told me not so well, and that he was hungry. I told him I could help him out with a meal, so we walked over to the other side of the street, rather dangerously, as he boldly crossed without the signal of the little walking white man. He wanted to get Mexican food, so asked (more like told me) to go inside and order something for him while he would meet me outside across the street. I went in and found out the cheapest thing was seven dollars (and I only had five) so I met up with him and told him that I could instead buy him something from the Chinese place I had seen a couple blocks away. He waved his hand, motioning for me to let him think, and he asked whether I could use a credit card, and I told him yes, if they'd let me. Then, knowing I only had five dollars cash on me, he asked whether I would let him hold on to the five dollars while I went and used my credit card to get him some shrimp fried rice. Apparently, he distrusted that I would actually come back with the food. "Alright, I'll let you hold onto it as a promise that I will be back, but I expect you to give it back to me when I come back." (I knew that there was a very good chance that the five dollars wouldn't be there when I got back, but I wanted to show him that I trusted him). Sure enough, when I came back fifteen minutes later with the fried rice, and asked for the five dollars, he apologized and told me that he had given the money to another guy to whom he owed money. (I had seen him with another guy before I came back.) "I'm pretty upset--you promised that you would give me back the five dollars. I don't really care about the money itself, but you broke my trust." We talked it over, and although I had a pretty good feeling that he still had the five dollars on him, and was lying to me, I decided not to ask the man who he was talking to earlier whether Randy had truly given him the five dollars. I wanted to convey to him my disappointment, but at the same time, I knew I wasn't really talking to Randy, but to the need for crack in his system. So I let it go and he asked me what I wanted to do. I suggested we go see a movie at the theatre, and he visibly got excited. We were about twenty minutes late to the movie, and we found out that they didn't accept credit cards, so I asked the lady behind the counter whether she would let Randy in without pay and I would come back with enough money for the two of us--and she allowed it! The movie was an experience--Randy kept on talking out loud and laughing uproariously, until he calmed down a bit when another moviegoer asked him kindly to keep the noise level down. Two thirds through the showing, he was asleep, and I woke him up to leave the theatre. I hung out with him for a while outside, and he shared how he saw his father shoot his mother in front of him when he was only 7. He still hasn't forgiven his dead father for what he did and who he was. By the end of the conversation, Randy had confided to me that he didn't really have anyone else that he considered a true friend--they were all other crack addicts or prostitutes. I gave him my number, and he promised to call me the next day. He did finally call about a week later--and I asked him how I could pray for him. He asked for prayer that God would save his soul! The conversation was quick because he was borrowing a phone from someone else, but I'm hoping and praying that God will save his soul, and more.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-21855912346178022972008-08-24T14:25:00.000-07:002008-08-24T15:38:16.866-07:00To End All WarsI was reminded of one of my favorite movies "To End All Wars" as I was reading Philip Yancey's book "Rumors of Another World." It's about a British officer named Ernest Gordon, who was captured by Japanese soldiers during World War 2 ("the war to end all wars," hence the name of the movie) and forced to do manual work in a prisoner of war camp to help build a railroad line. Over 80,000 men died during the construction of the track, of sickness, starvation, and being shot. Naturally, the bloody realities of the camp led to a spirit of competition and every man for himself. Yet God's spirit was moving beyond the understanding of any of them--for a singular event happened which catalyzed a movement of unity that is practically unmatched in the history of human struggle. During roll call one day it was discovered that a shovel was missing, and the guards asked who had stolen the shovel. When no one answered, the guards threatened to kill them all, until one man from the line of men stood forward, claiming, "I did it." The angry guard quickly fell on him with blows all over his body, but he still stood to attention. Enraged, the guard crashed his rifle butt down on his skull, and he fell down, dead. This event had an unexpected result among the prisoners--one of them remembered the words of Jesus--"Greater love has no one than this that he lay down his life for his friends," and the whole direction of the camp changed. Instead of fighting and stealing, the men began to live sacrificially for one another. Gordon felt the direct effects of this as his comrades helped revive him when he had become so sick he was on the verge of death. One exchanged his personal watch for some medicine to help him with his fever. The men were now living in spiritual community that no ruthless guard could take away from them. By the end, when they were finally freed, the men treated the sadistic guards with love and kindness instead of revenge. I like the way Yancey uses the miracle of this POW camp to illustrate the way the church is in the world--<br />"In the soil of this violent, disordered world, an alternate community may take root. It lives in hope of a day of liberation. In the meantime, it aligns itself with another world, not just spreading rumors but planting settlements-in-advance of that coming reign."The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-12940707064766778742008-08-22T11:41:00.000-07:002008-08-22T12:13:43.276-07:00Loneliness“Solitude is the profoundest fact of the human condition. Man is the only being who knows he is alone"<br />--Octavio Paz<br /><br />I was lonely yesterday. In my sojourn among the homeless of skid row, I've spent alot of time alone--perhaps more time than I've ever spent in my life. I love people--love connecting with people, smiling and laughing with them. Yet, I've come to realize that my times with people are worthless unless I know what it means to be alone. So I'm grateful for God is teaching me through these days--that when I'm lonely, He is the only one who really can satisfy my hunger for appreciation and praise and company. I still remember towards the end of my time in the Servant Partners internship when my intern director, Kevin Blue, mentioned that loneliness was a common aspect of ministry in the city. And I also remember talking with Brad at a recent wedding that as he gets older, he finds increasingly fewer people who are walking a similar path--not getting caught up in the materialistic flow of western church culture. But last night I talked for a while with a brother who was running from God for three years--and now has seen God answer his prayers as he has given up all to follow. He is going to be teaching kids in Baltimore, starting Monday, and he doesn't even know where he's going to live! God is good :)The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-22699554342891988182008-08-21T12:42:00.000-07:002008-08-21T12:43:16.795-07:00Praise of menI was listening to a sermon by John Piper about fasting--he was sharing about the passage which says that we should not anounce our fasting to the world to prove that we are more spiritual. Fasting becomes a hypocritical act if it is done for the audience of others because it proves that we are hungering for acceptance from others rather than the praise of the One. This applies not only to fasting but to every good thing we do in the world.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-42653044342698806622008-08-21T12:41:00.001-07:002008-08-21T12:41:48.633-07:00Does God always satisfy the need of our souls?One common danger that Larry Crabb points out in his book The Papa Prayer is a tendency to think that blessings from God satisfy our souls more deeply than God Himself. "The problem, of course, is that our relationship with God is so shallow that the pleasure it brings really is less than the pleasure we feel when life goes well."<br />The second reason Larry warns against the deceitfulness of things outwardly going well in our lives is because frankly, truly and sincerely living for God doesn't always produce a warm feeling of joy and meaning. "In the moment...giving priority to our relationship with God may not produce the maximum satisfaction in our souls that we legitimately desire."The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-21698174305787509032008-08-21T12:36:00.000-07:002008-08-21T12:39:47.884-07:00Seen written on the sidewalkRebel and Revolt<br />And join UPACT<br />United People Against Crimal Tactics<br />Regarding homeless persons on the NICKEL 5th street<br /><br /><br />I talked with the guy who wrote this--he tried to get me to join in his campaign of chaos by upturning public trash cans and ganging up on solo cops as I wheeled him around on his wheelchair two weeks ago.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-28998840105044438992008-08-21T12:35:00.000-07:002008-08-21T12:36:42.696-07:00LamentWeep, weep for those <br />Who do the work of the Lord <br />With a high look <br />And a proud heart. <br />Their voice is lifted up <br />In the streets, and their cry is heard. <br />The bruised reed they break <br />By their great strength, and the smoking flax <br />They trample. <br /><br />Weep not for the quenched <br />(For their God will hear their cry <br />And the Lord will come to save them) <br />But weep, weep for the quenchers <br /><br />For when the Day of the Lord <br />Is come, and the vales sing <br />And the hills clap their hands <br />And the light shines <br /><br />Then their eyes shall be opened <br />On a waste place, <br />Smouldering, <br />The smoke of the flax bitter <br />In their nostrils, <br />Their feet pierced <br />By broken reed-stems . . . <br />Wood, hay, and stubble, <br />And no grass springing. <br />And all the birds flown. <br /><br />Weep, weep for those <br />Who have made a desert <br />In the name of the Lord. <br /> <br />by Evangeline PatersonThe Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15459876.post-26193506243409787942008-08-19T19:39:00.000-07:002008-08-19T19:45:53.836-07:00DavidThe other day I was walking to the library, and I was hailed by a skinny man with a cardboard sign which had "Looking for a miracle" on it. He asked me for a miracle, followed by, "even a small one." I told him I didn't have any cash on me, and then whether or not he wanted something to eat, mentioning that I could buy him something from the Carl's Junior down the street. He was excited about that, and I came back with a Big hamburger, a banana milkshake, and a spicy chicken sandwhich (which I got for myself). As we ate, he told me a little more--he didn't have any family in the area because he was an orphan from Cuba, and he had been on the streets for ten years, but avoided skid row area because of the danger. He told me there were warehouse jobs that were hiring, and he was hoping to get one. I gave him my number, and he told me that he would give me a call later.The Flickhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15464570807259534418noreply@blogger.com1